I almost said it out aloud: be where you are people!
I’m visiting Stockholm and today I walked into this hand-made sweets shop in the old town where we got to watch lollies being made. It was very cool watching the candy-cane-maker (I asked her what her job is called) and she was telling us about it as she was doing it.
In front of me are two people who are looking at the scene before us through their small mobile phone screens as they video it.
I’m sure you’ve videod things before – keeping the phone in position takes up quite a bit of your attention.
Not only that, the process took about 10 minutes and involved a lot of rolling of the goo. It will be one of the most boring videos ever made, I pity anyone they oblige to sit through it.
But my point is – they weren’t actually there for it! To actually watch the young woman do it in real life was actually a fun thing to catch by chance. But these two people missed that and saw only a small version of it on a screen with only a portion of their attention actually dedicated to it. They would be better off watching a YouTube video of it on their TV at home (I bet there is one)!
A few days ago a friend sent on a video that his friend had taken of the start of a sprint race at the Olympics. He was there, just metres away from the start line of a 100m race! Yet neither he, nor the people in front of him, all of whom were videoing too, actually saw it! They didn’t experience it! They didn’t get to look closely at the athletes, listen to the starting process, notice how it feels to be right there!
The television coverage of the Olympics is fantastic! No mobile phone video will compare. So why would you trade the experience of actually being there right next to the start line, for a hand held video of the first few strides?!
It does my head in!
Our phones are brilliant devices for so many things. They and Google Maps have completely transformed travel for the better. I could wander around that old town today without a map, not caring if I got lost, because I knew the Google would get me safely to a Lime scooter and direct me to scoot back to my apartment whenever I wanted from wherever I was. It’s awesome!
But they can also be a trap. They can take us out of the experience we’re having and into the process of entertaining or impressing others.
Research on using our phone cameras shows that the intention we have when photographing determines whether that photography adds to or detracts from our experience. If we are taking a photo or video because we want to remember and enjoy something again in future, it gives us joy and adds to the experience. If we are taking a photo or video to post on social media or show others, it detracts from the experience.
One of the three core commitments of PAR (People Against Rushing – an imaginary organisation I created years ago which now has many members) is to be where you are. Show up for your life as it is right now.
When we turn a life moment into a social media moment before we’ve had it, we’re not actually there for it. We’re already off anticipating that hit of approval we’ll get from showing it to others.
I can’t imagine these people were capturing the making of lollies to re-watch themselves because they wanted to remember the experience. It just wasn’t that scintillating! I bet the videos are already on some social media feed somewhere, and they missed the very cool experience of being there, watching and listening with full attention to (and asking questions of) the young woman displaying her craft.
What is your relationship to your phone camera? Is it a tool for re-visiting enjoyable experiences? Or do you use it compulsively for impressing or entertaining others, with experiences you didn’t fully have?
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